RE: Haircuts

["Nancy Whittier" <nwhittie email smith edu>]

Hi Judy,

Same dilemma here, except Isaac's hair is too short and wispy to worry
about yet.  We've trimmed Eva's bangs many, many times, and just let the
rest grow - it's down below her shoulders now.  I think we'll cut it,
too, pretty soon, because it's just not  practical for a baby.  It gets
tangled, it's too easy to pull, it gets food mats in it, etc.  But I
hate to cut it because I love that long, wispy baby hair and once she
has a full hair cut she'll look like a bigger kid...already people think
she's a very tiny 2-year old because of the hair.  

I can't imagine a traditional short hair cut for any of my kids, though.
 Jonah often got  mistaken for a girl when he was younger (not anymore
as his hair is shorter and virtually all the girls his age have long
hair and those who don't are mistaken for boys).  It didn't bother him
at all, mostly because he had a framework for understanding sexism that
he got at home.  We introduced the concept related to clothing and color
choices, then it was easy to extend to hair.  If you like long hair, and
are willing to deal with it, then why not just trim their bangs for now
and let the rest grow.  Eventually they will express their own
preferences soon enough.  If you didn't want to trim the bangs, you
could use barrettes, but that always seemed like way too much trouble
for me (plus the problem of attaching a choking hazard directly to the
babies).  

We cut her bangs when she was asleep at first, in the carseat so she was
upright but now she doesn't sleep that deeply.  We've had good luck when
she was calm and drowsy after a nap, holding her in a lap.  When she
came along for big brother's haircut, the hairstylist cut her bangs
(much better than we did), and she held perfectly still in my lap, I
think because she was a little intimidated.  You could also try having
one adult read her a book, while another held her and a third trimmed
the bangs, or a video if she would watch.  

Nancy

-----Original Message-----
From: Judy Anderson [mailto:yduj CS Stanford EDU]
Sent: Wednesday, February 04, 2004 8:09 AM
To: nonsexist-parenting cosmos phy tufts edu
Subject: Haircuts


So we've never cut Jocelyn or Perry's hair.  It's starting to get in
their eyes.  Brushing it back doesn't last for longer than 10 seconds,
and it's not long enough to tuck behind their ears.  I'm all
conflicted about cutting their hair, mostly because I love long hair
on both men and women.  Are we just going to end up with a
"traditional boy haircut" for Perry?  If not, are people going to
confuse him with a girl?  Am I (or is he) going to be upset with this?

We have some friends who have a boy, now 8, and they never cut his
hair, and everyone did confuse him with a girl for a long time.
Interestingly, though, now that he's old enough to choose, he has
chosen to keep his hair long in the back (I'm talking butt-length
here) and short in the front.

If we do decide to cut their hair, how do we get them to sit still?

   Judy Anderson yclept yduJ                'yduJ' rhymes with 'fudge'
   yduJ cs stanford edu      http://www-cs-students.stanford.edu/~yduj
   Jocelyn & Perry 7/21/02  http://cosmos.phy.tufts.edu/~kdo/children/

_______________________________________________
nonsexist-parenting mailing list
nonsexist-parenting cosmos phy tufts edu
https://cosmos.phy.tufts.edu/mailman/listinfo/nonsexist-parenting

_______________________________________________
nonsexist-parenting mailing list
nonsexist-parenting cosmos phy tufts edu
https://cosmos.phy.tufts.edu/mailman/listinfo/nonsexist-parenting