Barbie

["Bell, Beth (M. Elizabeth)" <Beth Bell astrazeneca com>]

Hi Folks,
What nonsexist parenting list would be complete without the doll parents
love to hate?

Here's the (long) story:
I have three kids, Irene (4 1/2), Noah (20 months), and Charlie (20 
months).
Before Irene was old enough to express a preference, we dressed her in
unisex clothing, decorated with animals, trains, and flowers. She was a 
high
need/active baby and still is more active than her toddler brothers.  There
are pleny of puzzles, balls, books, baby dolls, trains, legos, and dress up
clothes for both sexes and a toy tree-house in our playroom.  We also have
Jessie and Woody dolls.

I have NEVER bought a Barbie, and I didn't like them much when I was a kid;
my practice when Irene received a gift Barbie was to let her have at it as
long as she wanted When she lost interest in Barbie after a few days, I
would throw the doll away. Her grandma had an old box of Barbies from the
70s, which Irene played with at Grandma's.  They have slowly migrated to 
our
house.

Now Charlie is showing interest in Barbie, and I actually like to see him
playing with these dolls. Last night he found a portrait of Barbie, and he
carried it around looking at it adoringly for about a half-hour. Why is it
"ok" for him to play with Barbie and not Irene?  Noah is strictly a wheeled
vehicle kid.  THey wear their sister's hand-me-downs, which at this age are
unisex.

At the time Barbie came out, she was revolutionary in that she was neither 
a
mommy-doll, a baby-doll, or a child-doll.  She's not married, although she
does keep Ken stringing along.  She's versatile--in her many forms she 
lives
out fantasies that many people (including girls) have.  These are the
positive things I'm trying to keep in mind as I worry about the distorted
body image and pretty-face stereotypes being imprinted on my kids.  

So, do I allow Barbie a permanent place in my home, for all kids?
My earlier strategy of discretely disposing of these dolls clearly won't
work any more. Right now Irene considers all Barbies "hers" because they 
are
"girl toys."  Should I go out and get a Barbie for Charlie? Irene would 
love
to have someone to play Barbies with, as I'm not interested.  What about
Noah, who isn't even interested? I shudder to think of Barbies littered all
over the house like so many Stepford fashion dolls.  

BETH